My Dearest Katherine,Every night I check in on you and your brother before heading to bed. Last night you looked so sweet and peaceful lying there. Your fine blonde hair was lying tussled against your cheeks, you were cuddling Big Bear and Cathy Bear and all the blankets you insist on being covered with caused the formation of little wet hairs around your forehead. You looked so happy, serene, still, peaceful.
My natural clock encourages me to stay up late so I decided to watch you for a while and pray. I prayed for everything related to you I could possibly think of. For me to be a good mom and wife, to have patience, to show you unconditional love, teach you about your heavenly father and how to care and love for others, to put others first, for your first day of school (for me and you), to give you wisdom even as a child, to encourage you to enjoy learning and for the sinful struggles we're not even aware of yet. I prayed for your future husband, for your pre-teenage years, for your relationship with your brother, for your continued health and happines and most importantly for you to desire pleasing God.
Lately, throughout the day, you randomly tell me you love me, and those are the best moments of my day - every day. You are the sweetest girl; happy, animated and a natural-born cuddler. Your smile coupled with your big bright blue eyes is heart-melting.
You have changed so much in the last year. Everyday, you seemed to have left a little part of your babyhood behind.
You have developed a love of dancing, mostly in your purple princess dress every day to any music that's fun. And you enjoy dancing for Nathan, just to make him laugh.
You love every single one of your babies and play with them equally: Sophie, Emma, Octopus, Kristen, Baby Alive (Natalie), Gwen, Nannette, Peyton, Calista and Dora. You dress them, change their diaper, wipe their hineys, feed them, burp them, push them around in the stroller and grocery cart and insist on taking one of them with us at least once a week. You have started declaring that you are a mommy, to your babies of course. And then you'll look at me and ask, "Am I a good Mommy, Mommy?"
Your mis-pronounced words are still cute and I don't try to correct. You'll figure it out one day and I'll probably cry. I've started going to a "buddy stubble" (that would be a bible study, of course).
You still enjoy my nicknames for you: Punkin, Sweet Pea, Sugar Plum and my favorite Sunshine.
My funny faces still make you laugh and so far I'm enjoyable to be around. I still know all the answers and when needed, you willingly let me help.
You are the queen of specificity. You’re not really a diva about it. Yet. You are so very detailed. Your dainty little fingers managed to screw in a microscopic screw with a tiny-size screwdriver most men would fumble with. You enjoy writing out lists and carrying around a checkbook. You are the big helper for whoever is grocery shopping because you'll mark the items off the list, and you sit still.
Each Sunday, you go through about 4-5 dresses until you find something that works. I know that you're looking for the dress that twirls the highest and prettiest. Then it's coordinating hair bows, socks, shoes, whatever. You’re quite the fashionista! I hope you'll teach me some fashion sense one day. I am enjoying getting back into touch with my girly side. It was lost for a while.
I have really enjoyed watching you interact with your brother. You are so kind to him (most of the time) and are very careful to share with him. You love to tickle him, play peek-a-boo, make him laugh and carefully drag him across the floor by his feet. He is fascinated by you. You love him so much, and you tell him all the time. I hope your relationship with him continues to flourish, although I know there will be rocky times.
This Fall, you will be heading to preschool, too. This time last year, I could not have let you go. You were not ready. You were so clingy and needy; you were a baby still not quite sure what a new baby coming into our household soon would mean. But now? Now, you don’t need me quite as much and you’re excited about becoming a big girl and starting school.
Becoming a big girl seems to have happened overnight. It can’t have been three whole years, yet. Has it? Already? I remember your entrance into this world so vividly. I remember holding you as an infant, trying to make you fall asleep by sheer will alone. We chose to err on the side of caution so you got away with a lot. That's okay, though. We were learning also.
When I watched you last night, your tiny little body seemed much bigger than that of a three-year-old. You are growing up so fast and I enjoy it but also mourn it. It is what you're supposed to do and are doing so well. But the precious moments I try to cherish are ever so fleeting. Your great-grandmother would say the days are long, but the years are short. And three and a half years has passed faster than the blink of your beautiful long-eyelashed-eyes.
I love you precious, more than you'll ever know. God has blessed you. You are His.
~Mommy
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